Full-Moon Night, under the Pipal Tree — II
Long Tale of Gathering of Emotions: The Second Night

Neelam Oswal, Psychologist, Vinchurni, Phaltan

 

On the second night, everyone finished their work quickly and gathered on time at the tree base. The moon was to rise a little late that night. It was a bit cloudy and there was no breeze. For a long time, all the mental factors, parts of the human mind, were sitting expectantly at the tree base, engrossed in their own thoughts.

Anger was sitting on a slight elevation. He knew that everyone was waiting for him to speak; but he was not sure how to begin. Should he first present the questions that had risen in his mind the previous day? If he were to do so, how should he go about it? He was gathering himself within his mind.

‘I have already been labelled as a garrulous person. Should I ask the assembly whether there is at least someone here who feels that s/he is of some use?’But if I ask this question, would it mean I accept the label ‘garrulous’?

Should I say ‘there can be good and bad emotions?’ Would it amount to causing a split among us? After all, what are the criteria for badness? Is it causing harm to others or causing harm to oneself?

Anger’s mind was in turmoil over these questions.

All at once, there came a voice, “Folks, everyone seems uneasy.”

The group sitting at the tree-base was startled by the sudden voice. Everyone turned to where Anger was seated. The speaker was not Anger, neither was Conscience speaking! The voice was heard again,

“Everyone seems to be in discomfort.”

That someone should speak up without waiting for him to do so, was a great insult to Anger. Normally, he would have made it an issue, but today’s situation was different. He too wanted answers to his problems.

‘Is it a hallucination?’

No!

‘Is someone mocking?’

The tone of the voice however did not indicate mockery!

‘We are truly uneasy since last night! Is someone looking at us with pity thinking ‘poor emotions’?’ But the voice did not seem to reflect this either. The voice had been calm. It was saying something factual.

Some clearly asked “Who is this?”

A few heads turned and a few necks craned to try and identify the speaker. The entire gathering had now become restless.

After the first wave of restlessness abated, the same voice began again, “I am Mindfulness or Awareness. Earlier, I used to be called as ‘Sati’. I too, like you all, am part of mind.” The voice came from far behind, even farther than where Conscience had been sitting the previous night. She was sitting on a swing at the rear, but the swing was still and not moving.

‘Part of the mind?’ ‘What’s your job?’ ‘Why did we not see you yesterday?’ She was bombarded with a plethora of queries.

She allowed the questions to die down before calmly answering them. “Hmm... yes, it is true that I did not appear yesterday!” Conscience could not help noticing the stress laid on ‘appear.’

“My job is to pierce deeply whatever is taking place in the mind at the present moment. When one looks inward and starts introspecting, I begin my work. In yesterday’s meeting, in the beginning, everyone was getting carried according to his or her nature. Nobody was aware of the reality of himself or herself properly. It seemed Anger was becoming aware of his situation but he was holding others responsible for it.” The assembled ones got surprised.

“I was around; but I cannot function in any confusion like what we witnessed yesterday. And just because I did not function, nobody noticed that I was present, right?” As an answer everybody showed a lot of eagerness and some disbelief as well.

“Each one of you began to look at yourself, your work and your objectives after Conscience raised his points. This gave me the opportunity to start my work.” The introduction of Mindfulness or Awareness was complete.

Conscience, sitting in front today, felt slightly ashamed. Till now, everyone had felt that he had answers to all questions and therefore, he too had felt the same.

Despite his self concept, he was not able to find a solution to the problem faced by the Anger yesterday. Having realised for the first time his own incompleteness by the largesse of Mindfulness, he became embarrassed.

Each one of those assembled realised that since yesterday, something had stirred in their hearts.

Even Anger was listening to what Mindfulness had to say. He was wondering whether to welcome her or not, to the group of mental factors.

“You must have noticed that among the mental factors, I generally take a back seat,” Mindfulness continued, looking at the mental factors intent on looking at them.

“In the constant flow of the mind, the honour of sitting in the front row belongs to Anger and Affection or so to say Aversion and Craving. Each one of you is helping the mind to respond to external events. If the external event is pleasant, it is Craving’s or Affection’s job to convey ‘Once more; more and more please!’ And if the external event is unpleasant, it is Anger’s job to say ‘No more, please!”

People started murmuring. “Affection and Anger, – one fair and the other dark...., one desirable and the other undesirable! But both with equal status? Both with the same kind of job? How is it possible?”

Finally, Affection took the lead. Examining his experiences again and again, he said, “If anyone pays attention to me, helps me or pampers me, I rise like a flood tide. I wish to hear those tickling words of praise again and again. But if I 3 don’t hear the praising words I heard before whenever I want to, I also recede like a neap tide and pave the way for Envy, Jealousy and Anger. In that respect, both of us are similar, extrovert, oscillating.”

Everyone appreciated the openness of Affection to accept his own lacunae. He was trying to get out of the image of being good just because he was desired by everybody. One can imagine how relieved Anger was at this point.

“Even if pungent and sweet are opposites, both are still tastes!” Logic came to the conclusion.

“There have always been attempts to create a rift among you all by saying so and so is good and so and so is bad.” Wisdom, sitting by the side of Mindfulness, now began to speak. It looked as if Mindfulness and her friends were going to steal the show.

“Though the nature of each one of you is different, there is one quality that is common to you all,” said Wisdom, pausing deliberately for effect. The gathered group began looking at one another wondering what could be the quality common to all. When Wisdom saw that adequate interest had been generated, he continued, “...and that is to create agitation in the mind.”

A long, collective sigh passed through the congregation.

“The mind keeps on flowing. A mental factor enters the flow as per the situation and moves on with the mental flow. While flowing with the mind, if any of you gets stuck on to some event...”

Quickly grasping the inquiring expressions of the crowd, Wisdom explained what ‘getting stuck’ meant. “Getting stuck means not seeing the new external event but continue to think of the previous event. It is not allowing the mental factors necessary for the new events to come forward and parking oneself in their place instead. If that happens, the flow stagnates, as if a slimy layer of algae is formed making the mind ill. Thinking of the same event again and again and getting stuck to it can happen to anyone – Anger, Fear, Joy or Love.”

Worry and Fear were relieved that they were not the only ones getting stuck to one thing repeatedly like the repeating groove of a gramophone record. When it was understood that anyone could disturb and agitate the mind, a pleasant wave passed through everyone who had been termed garrulous so far. Anger got an answer to his question whether emotions were good or bad, useful or a hindrance, though not directly.

An event enters the mind from outside. Like a magnet, as soon as it comes in, it attracts old, memories related to it. Anger and Affection’s reaction as ‘once more’ or ‘not again’ is actually a joint reaction to the accumulation of the new event and the past elicited memories. If the reaction is intense, more is the probability that the mind keeps on thinking about it repeatedly. So more is the past baggage, the stronger will be the reaction and more will be the tendency to get stuck. But this means as we gain more and more worldly experience, we shall get further entangled into the web of action and reaction and the consequent uneasiness!

Everyone had seen this happening so many times that they could not even imagine what could happen differently. ‘Seems that the algae would ever keep on accumulating!’ the wave of pleasure slowly turned to uneasiness.

Everybody was virtually disappointed. Just then Mindfulness or Awareness, spoke with confidence: “While responding to an external event, if you are aware of me sitting in the back row, then you will not get stuck. If you don’t want to get stuck, instead of reacting to the past memories, try to understand the reality in the present moment and respond only to that.”

Some appreciated the assertiveness in the statements made by Mindfulness. “But how do we achieve this daunting task?” others started wondering. Some did not like the reference made by Wisdom and Mindfulness to ‘you’ and ‘me.’

“Look here, all of us assist the mind in responding to external events. Some of us begin our work immediately and some, a little later. Let me explain this with a common example,” Mindfulness began with the éclat of an accomplished speaker who first places the entire point briefly and then analyses and explains it in detail, covering various aspects.

“Imagine that the event is the death of a dear one. As soon as the news is received, Sorrow’s work begins. ‘How did this happen? Did I fail somewhere? Now what is left for me to live for?’ Sorrow, Dejection, Remorse, Guilt, all these mental factors start working. Each one looks at the event through its own coloured glasses. Each one refuses to understand the reality that the person concerned is bound to pass away some or other day. Few days pass by in this manner. With the passage of time, it is possible to view the event as a third person. Reality is accepted. Wisdom begins his work.”

Everyone liked the manner in which Mindfulness had explained her point with an example in her calm voice. Though the expressions ‘we’ and ‘you’ were used, they were not boastful words by Mindfulness and Wisdom, nor was there a sense of superiority and inferiority and therefore, everyone felt good.

“If we work with you, does it mean that Wisdom, which generally arrives late, will start working right from the beginning?” This question came simultaneously from Logic and Curiosity.

“External events knock at the door of the mind. We thoughts and emotions respond to these external events. Nay, it must be said that reactions are given automatically. We rarely respond consciously. Many a times, we are scattered all over. Instead of being at the place where the event is happening, we are engrossed in different places. Then a response is given in whatever way possible based on what we understand and how we understand. Our job gets lengthened because the present event is not properly understood. Then the mind too becomes uneasy. Well...” The observations made by Mindfulness were unparalleled. Though she had pointed out mistakes, none felt offended.

“Along with us changes the breath and are born bodily sensations. When Anger is aroused, ears become hot; if there is fear, there is a lump in the stomach; when there is worry, it causes headache and so on. We exist in the flow of the mind. But these sensations which accompany us actually appear on body – isn’t it, Fear?”

Mindfulness addressed the question to Fear as if she knew what Fear had discovered the previous day. Fear shivered, ‘Seems that what I had realised was true; but how did she come to know that I knew this?’

‘Duality between mind and body seems to be an illusion, then!’ Conscience muttered to himself.

“When the flow of the mind is calm and peaceful, so are the incoming and outgoing breaths. But as soon as there is an indication that the mental flow would be disturbed, the pace of the breathing begins to change.” Fear completely agreed with Mindfulness.

“My job is to pay full attention to the event in the present moment. When we begin to pay attention to the changes taking place in the mind and body due to the external event, we are able to comprehend the current event completely. Being mindful means observing the happenings in the mind like verbalizations and images and also observing the changes in the breath and the bodily sensations each and every moment. ” Mindfulness now took a pause. Nearly everyone had heard the wise words from the back row of mental factors for the first time. The way to mitigate the unease suggested by Mindfulness seemed so simple that nobody believed it would work. They began to think again on the points raised by Mindfulness. They started discussing with those around them. A few started observing their own breaths and the sensations accompanying them.

“Could you manage?”

“Not me. What about you?” They asked one another.

“Hey, but what will happen if we are able to observe the breath like this?” Everyone sat up when Anger asked this question. Anger was still unable to feel his breath.

“As we start observing the breath, the changed breath slowly begins to stabilize. The agitation is reduced and the mind becomes calmer. Once the wandering mind is focused on the breath and is calmer, the associated sensations are realised clearly. It is like how we hear the tick-tock of the clock in the stillness of the night, but are not even conscious of it all through the day.” Mindfulness was conscious of the different speeds of breathing among those around her.

“Changes in bodily sensations is an important aspect of mental factors. But because of being subtle in nature, these changes are generally ignored. If we are able to pay attention to mental factors at the subtlest level, the present moment would be captured completely. It would reduce the restlessness which accompanies each of you in the first row of mental factors. Then there would be less chances of getting stuck in the current event,” Mindfulness said.

“Sister Mindfulness, your knowledge is truly profound! But this does not appear to be in the realm of possibility,” Anger, who was yet to manage to breathe freely, sarcastically began. “When my work is on, I will NOT be able to observe the breath. What do you think, people? Speak the truth.” Though he had asked them to speak the truth, Anger’s voice was so commanding that everybody voiced their affirmation.

“Mental factors in the back row are striving to come forth, what else?” said Envy.

All mental factors sank into confusion. Though the proposal by Mindfulness was systematic, those who were acquainted with Anger’s work agreed how difficult it was to observe one’s breath and sensations when angry. They were unable to determine their own status in this regard.

Having set a process in motion, Mindfulness was not the one to accept defeat. She took an overview of the situation and then said, “It seems nobody believes this is truly possible. The main reason for our disbelief is that we keep on hearing that our work starts only when we are expressed in behaviour. Having heard this constantly, we have also begun to believe this as true. However, Anger or Affection’s work in the mind starts much before they are expressed behaviourally and are seen by the outside world.”

These words of Mindfulness appealed to everybody. A seed germinates and a couple of leaves appear above the surface of the earth. However, the process of their creation begins much before the appearance of the leaves. To those who see superficially, the existence of the leaves is apparent only when they meet the eye.

All the mental factors realised that it’s the same with them as well.

“As soon as mental factors start getting aroused in the flow of mind, the breath and the sensations also begin to change. In those initial moments, the sensations are not as distinct as they are when mental factors are expressed behaviourally. I hope it will not be difficult to observe them in those initial moments,” said Mindfulness.

“But all this happens very automatically. I never ever get to know the change that takes place in the first moment,” Lethargy laid out lazily.

“Yes, not being aware is the present status. But with effort, we certainly have the capability to become aware of these initial changes,” responded Mindfulness.

“Someone or other is always knocking at the door of the mind. Even if the door is not being knocked, the mind is constantly working. This means then, that one should be aware of one’s breath every moment. – While walking, talking, working, sleeping.... one should be alert to the sensations during each of the activities.” It was Perseverance who spoke.

“If we start observing the sensations before they become distinct, then the discomfort that arises with the mental factors would reduce to a great extent. Thus, if we want to avoid very hard work, then it is our job to be alert and be aware of every twist and turn of the mind, at all times! This is the only royal road to our salvation!” This statement of Mindfulness made each one in the congregation realize his or her own depth.

“Hm... Suppose, all of us started becoming aware and even became successful in doing so, then the problems associated with emotions like Anger and Aversion would be less. Fine! But romantic and desirable feelings like Love would also diminish. How monotonous will everything be then?” Boredom made this remark with a yawn.

“Desirable and undesirable! It is truly difficult to get out of the yoke of this duality that has become a habit for years!” Mindfulness smiled sadly. Just a short while ago, Wisdom had explained how it was futile to label emotions as good and bad, as every emotion stirs the flow of mind. Boredom must have nodded off to sleep at that time. Mindfulness was ready to explain everything again, but that was not required. Two-three of those sitting next to him reminded Boredom of Wisdom’s words.

“What we are reducing is the discomfort accompanying the emotion and not the emotion itself. Emotions must be experienced fully on both physical and mental planes.” Mindfulness continued to speak calmly though her words had been challenged.

“Hey, but how is it that you know all this?” asked Doubt.

Ignoring the disbelief buzzing within the question, Mindfulness said, “Thousands of years ago, a great visionary showed this path. He went to the core of the reason behind the reign of sorrow in human life despite man’s yearning for joy. He found that the main reason for sorrow was the Craving in the mind. He experienced it personally how it was possible to come out of the shackles of this Craving and set the mind free. He taught the practical and useful technique for eradication of suffering of adopting the middle path by living every present moment with awareness. What I have told you is what he had gained by his personal experience.”

That night, Mindfulness did not say anything further. People found this path as easy, but unbelievable. Mindfulness however knew how difficult and challenging it was to live with awareness though it seemed easy. Although difficult, this was the way that would go to the core of the discomfort and remove it from the roots. This was the path that squarely faced the ever-changing reality. This was the only way to come out of the interpersonal conflict caused by Affection and Anger or Craving and Aversion. It would lead to the pure fountainhead of amity between people. But she was not going to say any of these facts. She had shown the way. Each one had to travel the path himself or herself. As they progress on the path, they would come to experience the rest.

Everyone was still in the same place. There was discussion in small groups.

“Hey, but such old-age knowledge is of no use in these modern times. Had it been so, psychologists would have immediately put it into use,” came a voice from one of the groups.

“But sorrow and discomfort would have been realised even by psychologists. What solution do they offer?”

The same person who had spoken earlier replied, “They say that the root cause of sorrow and discomfort is not in external circumstances but in our attitude to them.”

“None of us disagree with this.”

“They also tell us not to suppress emotions but to express them,” said another.

“Then Mindfulness too is saying the same thing! Do not hide any part of emotion. Get to know even the subtlest aspect of every feeling.” Devotion, who was convinced that the way suggested by Mindfulness was the only highway to liberation, spoke.

“Some say that no emotion is bad; but they have to be expressed at the right place and in a right manner.”

Mindfulness understood that the process of internalizing the new knowledge was under process. The new knowledge was being tallied with the earlier information. Anger was participating in the discussions among the various groups.

There was no formal end to that long meeting at the base of the Pipal tree that starlit night; nor was one necessary.

When it dawned, people left for their respective jobs but along with Awareness and Mindfulness!

The next day itself, the Pipal tree shed all its remaining leaves. The unseasonal rain had brought with it the aroma of wet earth. Bathed in the first rain, each branch of the Pipal tree brought forth a new shoot. Tiny pink leaves began to unfold from each of the shoots one by one.

Even after that night, the mental factors gathered at the base of the Pipal tree from time to time. They visited the place to sit in calmness and to watch their sensations in order to understand themselves. With practice they became more and more mindful and awake.

You will see that Pipal tree near the entrance arch of the village even today. Its leaves must be rustling in the breeze whispering, “Be awake! Be mindful!!”

Folks, you may well ask me how do I know all these proceedings in such detail.

Only for your ears, let me confide that I was very much there! The neutral Pipal tree was none but me!

 

November 2016

Neelam Oswal

neelvinchurni@gmail.com

Translated by C. Ravindranath